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May 4, 2021

The stigma of disloyalty

The other day, I asked a client of mine if she was loyal.

She looked at me, horrified. “Of course!” she said to me, half surprised and half indignant that I’d even asked – as if she’d be anything else!

“Yes,” I replied, “and that’s the problem.”

You see, there’s an unwritten law in society – the Law of Loyalty.

You’re expected to be loyal to your family, your culture and even society. But the biggest one is family.

“Blood is thicker than water,” we hear. “They’re your brother/sister/mother/father. You HAVE to forgive them/get along with them/etc.”

If you don’t – or can’t – get along, there’s a real stigma attached to stepping away from your family.

And that’s especially true if you choose to step away from your mother, regardless of her behaviour.